So at the end of September, I got a call asking me if I would participate in the MDA Lock Up Fund raising. Basically you agree to raise “your bail” amount and then go out and collect it. Now, I am not much a Fund raising type of person… it doesn’t help that the Asperger’s makes social interactions that more difficult. I don’t always know if someone is doing to really help me or to get rid of me or both (I guess).
I pretty much can’t say “No” when it comes to charity. I mean, if I have it, I’ll give it. I think it goes to the “Do unto others as you would have done unto you”. One of the charities that I am a fan of is Pay It Forward, which is a similar concept and my wife’s company has a Go-Give mantra that is a foundation of their philosophy.
So, I said “Sure”, that was End of September. All through October, I knew that it was there, but it wasn’t a high priority. I had The Elder’s IEP meeting, Fall Break, in Laws, Pa-Pa and J-lo coming to town and, oh yeah… training for 2 marathons. So, it wasn’t until the anxiety level got really high that it finally floated up to the top of my “To-Do” list. And so I set the online stuff out and sent out emails. It was short notice, I know, but I knew that.
So, Wednesday morning, an unmarked police car came to my work and a police office (actually a police cadet) came and served me the “warrant” for my arrest. Of course, my coworkers were a little funny as they made jokes about trying to break me out… gee thanks! Put that file in the middle of the cake I could hear the Keystone Kops playing in the background.
So, I sat in the back while we went to the restaurant jail house. I was a little disappointed that there wasn’t a cage in back of the cruiser. I could have rapped some NWA songs or maybe some Snow as ambiance of riding in the back of car.
When we got there, everyone was happy to see me, I was one of the first “jail birds” there. I was ushered to the back table court room where some guy The Judge sentenced me to wearing a straight-jacket stripped covering to take a picture. Now, I knew something was up that I had to walk behind the bars to “get into jail”. I was thinking that this was going to be an easy get away… none of these people looked like runners and I was in marathon training, so… come and on crash me! So, i got my mug shot and the judge sentenced me with the bang of his rubber mallet gavel and I was free to go. They asked me for bribes to set me free in the form of the donations that I had collected – extortion I tell you!
Now, I wasn’t done though… they had cell phones there as to call people to get even MORE money. So, what I did was looked through my phone and see who I hadn’t talked to in a while and then used their phone to call then. Workin’ the system. Now the first person that I called I was a little “off” and didn’t “sell” my predicament very well. However, by the time that I called my Brother Junior Johnson aka the Absolutely Fabulous Uncle Chris, it went down something like this:
(kinda whispering) “Hey Chris, this is Terry, I am in jail, I need some bail money”
“Oh really? Are you at a place where I can wire it?” Isn’t that awesome that one of my family members didn’t think twice about sending me bail? That’s awesome. Of course I would do the same thing… (And now I know the FIRST person I am going to call if I ever get booked by the 5-0 ;-P )
So, I called a few more people and managed to get some more money, but more importantly, talk to a few people that I don’t always get to talk to! I was probably there about an hour and the police cadet took me back to work. And yes I took pictures of my whole ordeal. And YES LADIES, I did get a picture of the cadet in his uniform because I know how you ladies love your uniforms… STOP LICKING THE MONITORS!
So all in all, I was to raise $1300
And looking at my site today… DAMMMNNNNNNN… you guys are awesome. I was at $235 yesterday morning and now it’s $345! SAH-WEET-TAH plus the $65 that I made from calling yesterday, that’s $410!
|From Terry Goes to Jail|